My occasionally snarky thoughts on everything from motherhood, politics, life and current events. Cocktails are sometimes mandatory. Bottoms up!

Monday, April 30, 2007

Up in the air??


If you know me very well, you know how much I vehemently dislike having plans or circumstances up in the air. Flying by the seat of my pants?? I'd rather be on the ground. It is difficult for me to "go with the flow" unless I have personally assisted in the creation of the river we're on. Stuff like that.

I am a planner. I like to have Plan A, Plan B, Plan C and then a backup plan for all of those plans. I like lists. Hard dates. Time tables. Menus. And (if need be) charts. Charts are good.

I like to know what's coming up next - and what I need to be prepared...

So as you can imagine, since the tapestry of Operation Sell This House is woven with strands of ambiguity, hope, finger crossing, what it, if then, maybe, and all manner of other feelings of **shrug** we just won't know until we know... I have not been the happiest camper.

(Grand sweeping understatement there. )

But just when I think I have permanently lost both my sanity and sense of humor - I'll often get a sign... Look...


So THAT'S what it looks like to have your house up in the air! I get it!

And somehow I feel so much better now just because I am not the owner of *that* place... Wow.

Bending Monday's Brain...

Time to take a break and waste time at work exercise those braincells. Here's Monday's Brain Bender via the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Ready to play?


What two words, formed from different arrangements of the same six letters can be used to complete the sentence below?

It is very ________ that children who get ________ as presents can build them successfully without help.


Huh. Well, depends on the kid I would imagine.... Anyway, like always the answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Goal!! Blog Meet, Dinner Party, and an Open House...

So, how was your weekend??

Par usual I over scheduled myself, but it all managed to come together and be a GREAT time! Well - Saturday was great - that's what counts, right? And Sunday still has opportunities to achieve greatness...

We hit the ground running Saturday morning with a soccer game. All sun no snow and Sporta scored her second goal of the season! Whoohoo! That's nothing but net right there...

Then it was off to lunch in Rockford to celebrate the homecoming of *my* favorite dispenser of Drunken Wisdom - That 1 Guy.

Tammi said it best:

"A few of us bloggers got together to chat, drink beer, eat fried food and give him shit. It was a GREAT way to spend the afternoon."

Amen to that. And Tammi has pictures to boot! (Note to self - it's time to up the SPF on my face for soccer games. I love red but this is getting silly!)

Hanging out with Tammi, Harvey and T1G is always a great time and I also had the honor of meeting another blogger I have been hoping to get to hug one of these days - Raging Mom from The Splatter Zone. What a treat!

After we had all eaten, drank, and made merry (thanks y'all!) and my girls had decided Hooters was the best place they had ever been for lunch ever (uh-oh) we headed for home... I had a couple of appetizers to make before we headed out to the little farmette our former neighbors now call home.

(Hey - I told you I had over scheduled myself....)

So some of the usual yummy was prepared in the form of Hot Artichoke Dip and I decided that this was a primo opportunity to test drive some tweaks made to a recipe given to me by a lovely lady and damn fine cook. You can see a picture of the variations of this culinary delight here. (And hey, Christina?? This stuff needs a name... Something *other* than crack....)

Oh yeah - a base of creamy warm garlicky cheese topped with bacon and shrimp scampi was what we enjoyed last night. Heaven. Heaven on a cracker... Crack... Mmmmmm....

Of course today dawned with a heavy dose of reality. Reality in the form of - Holy crap! We're having an Open House!!! ::much running around and arm flapping did follow::


So now it's three o'clock, and all is well. And with the exception of getting the girls squared away for school tomorrow and the *bleepity* *bleep* *bleep* Church Newsletter done I am all done. Done, done, done, done... With a side of Done sauce. Kaput.

The patio is calling me. As is a glass of wine... Oh - and we had a few "very interested" parties come through the house today amongst the throngs of people groups that came to visit.

St. Joseph must be happier, T1G - thanks for the suggestion...

Friday, April 27, 2007

Fun for Friday

A good way to end the week I think. Ready for the Brain Bender via the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar??


Place the same three letter word in each blank below to make four different words.
  • BL_____
  • SP_____
  • C_____
  • SQU_____

And just for the heck of it (and since I missed yesterday)...

Which of the numbers below is least like the others? (The face that 10 is a two digit number is irrelevant.)


See? Fun! And like always the answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Round and round...

...and back again.

It has just been one of those weeks.

The field trip went fine - though I had that moment of epiphany about 2.5 seconds into the bus ride. That "Holy crap - what have I gotten myself into??" epiphany. Someday, maybe I should learn something.

Anyhoo - we got to our destination (The Discovery Center) and I discovered that my camera batteries were dead. Ah well, non-digital memory will just have to suffice. It was all pretty fun in a "squirrel herding" kind of way.

Afterwards a yummy lunch was had at a great Japanese restaurant . Picture for a moment 85 nine year olds spread out over 10 tables watching a Japanese chef flip, dice, sautee, chop and flame all sorts of yummy goodness. I thought the kid next to me was going to pass out from the sheer ecstasy of it all - dude, you never saw fire before?? He was waaaay excited.

Right up until it was time to eat. Ahhhh... then? Not so much.

I'll give Sporta credit though - she raved about the food. Raved! And was asking when we could return before the lunch was even finished. That's my girl... So even though I spent the majority of my time schlepping kids back and forth to the bathroom...
"Mrs. D!! Mrs. D!!! - Did you know that the soap automatically squirts right into your hand?? This place is freeking AWESOME!"

"That's nice Jimmy - now maybe you should try some of the food!"

"Uh - I'll just have some rice...."
Culture - you just can't get enough. You should see these kids go through cheese and summer sausage though. It's a trip.

So anyhoo, we survived the field trip and made it home to continue the freekyness of getting the house ready to show. Oh joy. And just as we were bugging out - I noticed a nice black truck parked out front.

Oh goodie, the lookees were here.

So as we left we said hello - nice couple. Though they looked way to young to be *driving* let alone buying a whole house... I must be getting old.

So now, how to end this ramble... Right - Happy Friday! I am off to put more scratch into the girls therapy fund, and garner more supplies for the afore mentioned dreaded Open House, and to look for my sanity. I seem to have dropped it somewhere.

Oh, and does anybody have a spare sense of humor I could borrow? I could use a bit more of that too... The "kind and gentle" mom needs to be resurrected. The crabby and harsh one is getting on my nerves...

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Field Trip!!

Nothing like being able to take a little time to be a kid again.

I'm off - Sporta's class is headed to Rockford for a day of fun and learning, and with the exception of riding the big yellow bus I am really looking forward to it! And there will be lunch! Whoohoo!

So, anyhoo, pictures to follow later I think. And of course, the realtor called late last night to schedule a showing.


The up side is that the showing is scheduled for 7:00 pm - so I still have some time.

(And just between you and me? I hope these people are serious. Because in my mind that is not exactly a "convenient" time for people who have kids and stuff... But that's just me...)

Anyway, next time remind me to buy a house that is "self cleaning" - okay? I need one...

But for right now... Going on a field trip, field trip, field trip.... Going on a field trip. :-) It's all gonna work out fine...

Crazy is as crazy does... Or so I am told. ;-)

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

A conversation in my *OWN* head...

....because if I don't share the crazy it becomes permanent. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Me: "You should really get to work on the dining room floor, you know."

Myself: "Yeah I know. But it rained..."

Me: "So?? It needs done!! Hello - Open House Sunday. Remember???"

Myself: "I KNOW! But that's days away..."

Me: "Have you looked at the calendar?"

Myself: "What do you mean - I *write* the calendar..."

Me: "Well, tomorrow you have that field trip with Sporta's class..."

Myself: "Yay field trip!"

Me: "And Friday you have an appointment in the morning and WOOKIE (With Out Our Kids I'm Elated) lunch with the gals...

Myself: "Yeah?? I still have time..."

Me: "And on Saturday there's soccer, you are supposed to go south of the border for lunch and you have that other thing Saturday night."

Myself: "Oh..."

Me: "And the church newsletter is due Monday..."

Myself: "Shit."

Me: "Right - so let's get cracking!"

Myself: "Alright, give me just a sec..."


More math...

From the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Ready to play?


Milton left half his estate to his favorite charity and one third of the rest to each of his grandchildren. Each grandchild inherited $17,500.00

How much did the charity get?


And where did the rest of the money go? It's a mystery! Anyhoo - like always the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Musical Meme

Blatently stolen from wRitErsbLock over at Pereiraville. Hey - I need the distraction. And this was fun!

1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn’t make sense. NO CHEATING

How do you feel today?
Haunted - Evanecense (So they didn't have "spastic" eh?)

What’s your outlook on life?
Photograph - Nickleback (yup - I am a nostalgia girl...)

What does your family think of you?
Don't Fear the Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult (Hmmmmm...)

What do your friends think of you?
Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson (Hey - I am still here!)

What do strangers think of you?
Mustang Sally - The Commitments (Heh - I must be having more fun than I thought...)

What do your exes think of you?
The End - The Doors (Trippy - I forgot this was even on there!)

How’s your love life?
Someday - Nickleback (Uhhhh.... huh.)

How will your love life be in the future?
Bring me Back to Life - Evanescence (I really do think Amy Lee has an amazing voice.)

Will you get married? [Duh - been three done that]
How Sweet It Is (To be Loved by You) James Taylor (Heh - now *this* is a trip... and no - I didn't cheat)

Are you good at school?
Chatanooga Choo Choo - Glenn Miller (Well, it *has* been a while since I was in school. I guess I am doing okay in the 3rd and 4th grades these days...)

Gotta love You Tube.... Classic.

Will you be successful?
Get Me Outta Here - Jet (So I guess we *will* sell the house, eh?)

What song should they play on your birthday?
She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5 (Niiiiiice...)

What song should they play at your graduation?
Harder to Breathe - Maroon 5

The Soundtrack of your life?
Fell in Love With a Boy - Joss Stone

You and your best friends are?
When I'm Gone - Three Doors Down (I would hope so...)

Makes me teary...

Happy times:
Precious Declaration - Collective Soul (Oh yeah - I looooove this song.)

Sad times:
Crashed - Daughtry

Every day:
Better Now - Collective Soul (Oh yeah.... My favorite!)

For tomorrow:
Cold Hard Bitch - Jet (Uh oh... ;^) )

For you:
Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is - Jet (Not a bad policy...)

What does next year have in store for me?
Try a Little Tenderness - The Commitments (Oh hell yes - can we??)

What do I say when life gets too hard?
Home - Daughtry (My sanctuary, for sure...)

What song will I dance to at my wedding? [Again - been there done that. It was I Cross my Heart, btw... But let's see what the mp3 player says...]
My Immortal - Evenescence. (Well, alrighty then...)

What do you want as your career?
Redneck Woman - Gretchen Wilson (Awwww hell - this is getting funny!)

Your favorite saying?
Gel - Collective Soul (My shuffle is freeking hitting it out of the park!)

How will I die?
Ain't No Sunshine - Bill Withers (Yeepers....)

Scary?? Maybe... But it *is* a great song.

Okay, I'm taking my music and getting back to work... What's on your soundtrack?

Here's my Sign...

Lifted from Michele over at Letters from New York City. Sounds like my road, alright...

Richmond Highway
Loony-Bin Lane5
Bog of Eternal Marriage24
Fame City63
Childbirth Hospital113
Contentment Meadows409
Please Drive Carefully

Where are you on the highway of life?


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Some quick links...

Yeah, yeah. I know I should be doing housework - but I've got a couple of days...

First up, the serious stuff....

CalTechGirl has a post up today marking Armenian Martyrs' Day. Remembering the forgotten souls of a genocide that happened in Turkey during World War I.

What, you didn't know? Yeah - shamefully, me either. Hitler used the fact that no one cared to remember those atrocities (not long thereafter) to justify his desired "cleansing" of Germany... Those who fail to remember history are destined to repeat it. We need to remember.


Tammi pointed out that a woman has been awarded the Silver Star for the first time since WWII. Kudos to you Sgt. Hester!

And hello! Where is the 60 Minutes story on this act of heroism?!?! Hey Katie?? I have a great human interest piece for you! A good woman doing a great job - equal to her male peers. I want to see her on the news.

And Tammi also has the 411 concerning the celebration at the Pentagon for the Month of the Military Child. Taking care of the little guys is a great idea!


And now for some funny - Crystal over at Boobs Injuries and Dr. Pepper. Where do I even start... (Consider yourself warned - go pee before reading and don't be drinking anything. I am serious.)

The baby may smell like pickles (not for the first time) but she and her hubby got to have a romantic night alone.

Crapblogging? She may not have invented the concept - but from her it is beyond funny. Beyond.

Seriously, if ever you need a little "pick me up" or a tear spurting belly laugh - Crystal has it in spades. Just hit the archives and start scrolling. It will do you a world of good...

Okay - I gotta go clean. Operation Tidy is back in full swing - the countdown to Holy Crap We're Having an Open House has begun...

And now a message...

...from the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Here's my sign that everything is going to be okay. Ready to play?


The 26 letters below can be anagrammed into a seven-word proverb meaning that much is possible if a person really wants it.

What is the proverb?



Absolutely! I feel better now. And like always, the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Well hey... fall through all the time. Right? Right??

**sigh** Right.

Looks like my house is back on the market - ah well. At least I know that there are things that are up to me, and things that are not. And it's all good...

Stressful, but good.

A pain in the ass, but good.

And hey - I must be learning something. Right? And that's good too.

The good news?? Our house is going back on the market at a higher price.

The bad news??? It's going to be listed at a higher price because it will be sporting a brand new roof.

So I am coping the best way I know how - by planting flowers!

Because you know, if I am going to start having showings and an open house this weekend, I want this place tricked out.

And flowers make everything better...

Buddy Wisdom...

"Dogs make everything better too, Mummy. You should find a cool place and just lie down for a while..."

Maybe later, Bud. Maybe later.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Up to my eyeballs and sinking fast...

...but I think that's the motto for most Mondays isn't it? Either way - I am running today. So here is the brain bender a bit earlier than normal. Ready to play?


Mathew has three times as many sisters as he has brothers. His sister Sharon has the same number if sisters as she has brothers. There are no more than 10 siblings in the family.

How many boys and girls in the family?

(Alternate question - Who gets first dibs on the bathroom?)

And why not - a twofer:

In a math test, Roger was not last. Beth lost to Roger but beat Kelly. Kelly beat Eva and Sam. Eva was not last.

What was the order?

(And when the hell did they stop assigning grades?? I never in my life got "last" in a math test. Stupid...)


Anyhoo, you know what to do. The answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

First on the Block!


We were first on the block to turn on the air conditioning!




No I am *not* kidding - it was 82 today. And really, WxMan and I agree - comfort is important! We are always the first on out block to turn it on and last on our block to turn it off... It is what it is.

And in *my* mind - you can always put on another layer, but there are only so many you can take off.

I think I'm funny but I REFUSE to be the naked comic relief, so to speak...

Nuh uh.

But I did spend a glorious part of the afternoon parked next to this with a good book.

Can you say heaven? Burble...burble...burble...
I can...

Peaceful, isn't it? I think so too...

Saturday, April 21, 2007


And you know what that means,right??

Time to kick balls! :-)

Soccer balls.

But hey - it's 38 and sunny. It soooo could be worse.

What's on your agenda?

Update: The ball kicking went *very* well (Sporta scored her first goal of the season!) and now it's 70 degrees. I am setting up the fountain on the patio and playing outside. God, I love spring... :-)

Friday, April 20, 2007

Out and About

And is all springy and stuff!!

So off I go - no better way to combat the disconcerting start to my day than to look at a bunch of plants and pots and garden-y stuff, right? And then lunch with a friend to top it all off...

So as not to deprive you of your daily time wasteage brainercise - here is Friday's Brain Bender...


Which of the words below is least like the others? (The difference has nothing to do with vowels, consonants or syllables.)
  • TEAM


Hmmmm.... Sounds like themes for a new movie from the South Park guys maybe. Huh. Anyway, like always the answer will be found later in the comments - see you then!



So in the wee hours of this morning (4:36 am for the curious). I was having one of those not quite sleeping - certainly not awake "dreams."

Kinda like your brain flipping through the channels of the cosmos trying to decide where your REM should go next... *click* Korean students in a math class *click* a county fair *click* border collies running near a lake *click* baking an apple pie *click*

All the while with the song U + UR Hand by Pink playing in the background...

(Yes, I know it's weird - so sue me.)

Just then, clear as day - loud, but not shouting - I hear: "Hey, Richmond!"

My eyes are now open and I try to become fully awake. The masculine voice was both familiar yet not instantly recognizable. And after blinking for a moment, I turned my head to the right (towards the source of the voice). Though I felt a bit of apprehension, I was not afraid.

And no one was there.

I waited for more, but nothing came. The house was still. I tried to determine who was giving me a shout out... Sure sounded real. Hope everything is okay.

Tried to go back to sleep - but it just wasn't going to happen.

I am ready for the sun to come up now, at any rate. That's for sure...

Thursday, April 19, 2007


And I cannot decide what in the world I want to have. The handy dandy discount MENSA calendar is serving Alphabet Soup, though. Ready to play?


How many common English words can you make from the letters below, using all six letters once in each word?



Alrighty then, I am off to the kitchen to scare something up. Like always, the answers will be found later int the comments. See you then!

Breaking News!

The shooter at Virginia Tech was mentally unstable!


Can we get a collective "No shit, Sherlock!"

Hey television media dipshits - yes, I am talking to all of you. Especially NBC. How about this - stop glorifying this evil crazy SOB that did this and get his damn smirking evil crazy face off my TV. Now.

I mean it.

Stop mentally masturbating all of the shouldda, wouldda, coulddas that might have been. Nobody had a crystal ball here. The "blame" rests at the feet of the shooter, you morons. Stop besmirching the memories of the victims by trying to push whatever agenda you've got going.

Hey gun control advocates - Guess what?!?! The VA Tech campus was a "gun free zone." Doesn't that phrase just make your little hearts go pitty-pat?? Too bad the evil crazy mo-fo's of the world don't like to play by the rules. Did you notice?

Shut up already about strengthening gun control laws - do the f*ckin' math. THEY DON'T WORK.

And speaking of guns, for your information this is *not* the Biggest School Massacre Ever - THIS was.

1927. Bath Township, Michigan. Can you say Bomb?

Crazy dude was upset about his property taxes.

School violence was *not* born at Columbine. Deal with it. Since Og and Urg were fighting over who had the best cave - crazy and evil people have walked the earth. Wreaking havoc amongst the law abiding and peaceful.

That's just the way it is.

Now get that Evil Crazy Bastard off of my TV. And leave my guns alone. I plan to be in charge of my *own* personal safety thankyouverymuch. As best I can...

Do something constructive - pray for the victims of this senseless murderous spree. Stop glorifying the murderer. Try to think of something you can do to HELP in lieu of finding someone new to interview about what could have been done, what you think should have happened. It's over.

Except for the families who lost a loved one. For them it will never be over.

You should remember that.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

It's that time again!

Ready to waste time at work, exercise those brain cells? Here is the Brain Bender via the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar...


What one three-letter word can be placed in the blanks below to make four different words?
  • _____GUIN
  • _____ALTY
  • _____DING
  • _____SIVE


Okie doke, you know what to do. The answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!

With all of this arm flapping you'd think I'd at least gain some altitude...

Alternate title - "Yes I *am* a half crazed dumbass - what of it?"

Other alternate title "I have the bestest friends ever that love me even if I am a lunatic!"

Operation Sell This House is going to tip me right over the edge. I can just tell...

See me waving from waaaay up in my tree? (Ahhh - so that's where the "altitude" comes in...)

Lord, I can't wait for this whole process to be over! (And thank you to all of you that have been helping to talk me down - I couldn't do it without you...)

So last night we had the inspection of the house - the inspector got here early as I was still trying to gather up to bug out. While getting Sporta's soccer stuff together, I noticed that Mr. Inspector was talking to someone - Holy crap! The people who put the offer on my house! Ack!

It never occurred to me that they (the buyers) might be here for the inspection (they live an hour+ away) and my realtor didn't mention a thing about it. When I had asked *my* realtor what was expected of me during the inspection she said "nothing" and said it was fine if I was here or fine if I was gone.

Well, alrighty then.

So the house wasn't "show ready" - it was as it is when we are *living* here. You know - stuff on the counters, homework, cluttered desk, laundry on the folding table, blah blah blah.... I figured that the inspector would simply be looking at the nuts and bolts of the place - no need for scented candles or mood music, right?

Anyway, thank God I had the dishes done and had just run the vacuum and tidied up or I would have been totally freaking out...
[cue inner voice] ::So that's what you call *not* freaking out, is it?? ::

[cue *other* inner voice] ::oh, you just shut up::

Making things even better, along with the prospective buyers there was a small entourage consisting of Buyer Lady's mother and Buyer Dude's sister. Can I get another Holy crap?!?!?

So what do you do?

Well, if you're me - you invite everybody in to see the house! Yay!! ::commence the flapping of arms::

So Dude (the potential buyer) divided his time between my "house tour" and going around with the inspector. (Which was the hubby of *their* realtor and a friend of one of his cousins, I think. Wonderful. Nothing like a little nepotism.)

Meanwhile, I led the ladies on a guided tour of the house, explaining the history of certain things and showing them all of the quirky little custom details of the place - many things they had either not noticed or didn't know about.

The buyer lady's mom was just beaming the entire time. I know she loved the house. And the buyer dude's sister loved it too... Though I have to say it feels WEIRD to have total strangers opening your bedroom closet doors while you are in attendance. Gah. But all was well...

Finally (2 and 1/2 hours later) the inspector guy was done and Buyer Lady and I have just chatted up a storm. Buyer Dude seems like a really nice guy (he teaches high school in nearby town) and she plans to be a SAHM. They are expecting a baby in the fall. In my mind, the house couldn't be more perfect for them...

So the bottom line is either I have just queered the whole deal, or they love the house more than before. I am simply trying to get out of my *own* head about it.

And down out of this tree... ;-)

I need to laugh more...

And you probably do too. Via email here's a funny to start your day. (Thanks Suzy!)

Leapin' lizards! Eh? I love this guy's reaction. And the fact he didn't kill the dang thing amazes me...

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Nothing like a little pyro therapy....

Last night we had a nice fire -

That's something we have been talking about - new landscaping for the new house. Because I am not sure I want to give stuff like this up!

So today we went and looked at decking ideas, and fire pit options and all sorts of outdoor decorating stuff. This is going to be fun, if potentially expensive...

And the experience last night makes it all the more worth while to have a plan. It was in the fifties and the skies were relatively clear. And this early in the season, no skeeters to contend with! A perfect evening for a glass of wine on the patio.

I am going to miss this place... Not that I don't want to go! But I will miss it...

Money, money!

That's the theme for today's brain bender. Ready to play?


Picking up coins along the beach, Ryan found an equal number of pennies, nickles and dimes totaling $1.92.

How many of each did he find?


And what can you get for a $1.92 these days? Hmmmm... Bag of chips and a soda, maybe? Either way, the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

I got nothin'....


All of the news from Virginia Tech is just so damn sad...

I need to get away from it all for a bit.

Fortunately, RSM from When the Smoke Clears had some happy news for me today in my inbox - he has "spawned," so to speak.

So a big welcome goes to the Viking Medic over at The Quest for Valhalla! Looking forward to the journey, VM. ( And your post about liking older women - nice touch. You're going to get along just fine...)

And leave it to the illustrious Tammi over at Tammi's World to make me smile today as well with this post.

I think I need to have that particular Maxine framed and hanging here. Oh yeah...

Monday, April 16, 2007

Remember - this is where we are headed...

...and all of the stress will be worth it. Right?

(That's WxMan sneaking a peek....)


The great thing was getting a full price offer on our place. Now commences the firey hoop jumping. Gah.

The prospective buyers have elected to go with a state sponsored loan program which affords them the BEST INTEREST RATE IN THE UNIVERSE... /booming God-like voice from heaven.

The up side for them is that over the course of time they get to save a sh*t load of money. I get that...

The down side for me is that the "government" inspector (read 5,000% more picky and anal than your already picky and anal inspector) gets to crawl up our a$$ with a flashlight.** Wonderful.

You see, my house was built in 1893. Hello! 1893! What do you think building codes were like then??

"Well, if we can get Sven Olsen to allow us the use of his team and wagon along with those of yours and Earl's across the way, we should be able to gather enough support posts from the orchard in a day or two.. Everybody bring their own chain saw axe. Okay? I''ll have the missus fix dinner for us..."
Yeah, in our nanny state you gotta have a permit world today that kind of building "code" is going to go over really well. Not. (Remember this guy? and he *had* a permit! Just goes to show you can't legislate common sense...) But I digress...

Here, I'll show you. This is one of the original supports for this house -->

See what I mean? Now over the course of years, the house has been re-supported, shored up, brought up to "code," rewired, updated, and etc...

However, the walls in the living room are the original plaster and lath construction, the sub flooring is original, and Lord only knows what's in the attic. I'm not going to look...

And as much as I love all of the quirks this house has, something tells me that the inspector will not.

I mean really, what are the odds that they will NOT find lead based paint somewhere on the premises?? Seriously! Or a crack here, or a wonky non-plumb wall there!?!

There have been many updates, to be sure. Hey, I understand hat indoor plumbing is all the rage these days... But honestly, given that this house has been added-on to a MINIMUM of three times, how can you NOT expect there to be issues???

I know that when we bought this house 3+ years ago, all I wanted to know was that they place was structurally sound and up to code. I loved and expected all of the wonkyness that comes with owning an old house! It's the wonky that translates to charm when you do it right...

And I love my weird little house. It's comfy and friendly, and though it has quirks it has felt like home to me from the beginning. And I am not looking forward to it getting a F, so to speak. **sniff**

I just hope that the prospective buyers love it enough (and are intelligent enough) to understand that nothing in going to be "perfect" in a house that was standing when Grover Cleveland was president. 114 years ago, people - that's a long time...

** (Just for the record - yes, the house passed inspection when we bought it three years ago. I am just feeling the need to flap my arms... )

I am off to tidy up - the final exam inspection is scheduled for tomorrow. I need to prep my crib notes...

Now for a serious moment...

...before I post my next bit of "it's all about me" bullshit.

God help the students and families affected by the shootings today at VA Tech. I cannot begin to imagine what makes someone do things like this.

My heart just breaks for all who will mourn.

God help them...

Bending Monday's Brain

Here is today's brain bender via the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Ready to play?


What do the following words have in common? (It has nothing to do with vowels, consonants, or syllables.)


Okay, other than being themes in the next James Bond movie? No clue. But I am sure you know! Like always, the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

So you're giving me the finger, eh?

Heh. I found this over at Teresa's place who swiped it from CalTechGirl...

You Are a Ring Finger

You are romantic, expressive, and hopeful. You see the best in everything.
You are very artistic, and you see the world as your canvas. You are also drawn to the written word.
Inventive and unique, you are often away in your own inner world.

You get along well with: The Pinky

Stay away from: The Index Finger

Works for me! What finger are you?

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Yeah yeah....

...sometimes he says stupid things. But then he'll do sompletely unexpected and sweet!

Like taking the kids for a bike ride (whoohoo it's 54 degrees and sunny - summer's on the way!) and coming home with a little treat just for me.

Hot Tamales - my favorite. :-)

That's a nice way to spice things up...

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Return of the Soccer Mom...


And I have to admit, I am *not* that disappointed about it. 'Course that may have something to do with the fact that it is 32 degrees, damp, cold and horrible. And I don't want to go sit outside in it... But that's just me.

Somehow cheering Sporta on while sitting in the icy wind on metal bleachers isn't that appealing first thing in the morning... Go figure.

Now if I could just get Computa to stop "practicing" songs on her recorder... Something tells me I am going to get some excellent use out of my mp3 player today.

A good "soccer mom" wouldn't need one, probably. But she's unavailable at the moment. Heh... Oh! And Mustang sally just came on...

Mary had a Little Lamb is okay, of course, but Mustang Sally really hits the spot... Just sayin.'

Friday, April 13, 2007

Just continuing the fun....

With the last Brain Bender of the week. Ready to play?


What two words, formed from different arrangements of the same seven letters, can be used to complete the sentence below?

The guest at the hotel was full of bluff and _________. He acted as if he had been brought up in a mansion full of __________.


Well, Dude just needs to get over himself! As the happy dancing (see below) continues around here, I will leave you to it! The answers, like always, will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Friday the 13th!

Whoohoo! (And Updated!)

Now I know there are a ton of superstitions surrounding the day, but for me Friday the 13th has always been a fun and lucky day!

Many many moons ago, I was born on a Friday the 13th. See?? Lucky!

My hubby was born on a 13th as well (though not a Friday). Lucky!

He and I met and fell in love on a 13th (well - it was a 12th that flowed into a 13th) after I had spent the entire day in a big green dress at my cousin's wedding (followed by a dry reception -- hello!) and I subsequently needed a beer more than oxygen. Though the dress was unfortunate, the aftermath was Lucky!

I even found a picture so you can see too -->

And I have family (Hi Pop!) and friends that are "thirteeners" as well. Lucky!

So frankly, I can't wait to see what today has in store for me. It's bound to be something good....

Happy Friday the 13th!

Update: Dang - that was fast!! See, upon my return home after schlepping the girls to school and making a run to the bank I discovered a message waiting for my attention...

The realtor just called - out counter offer was accepted! Full price, Baby!!Whoohoo!!! With just one little stipulation - they want to split the difference between the proposed closing dates. Wanna know when they want to close???

C'mon - guess!!

July 13th. And no - I am *not* kidding. That's just the way things work around here, folks. Truth is stranger than fiction.

Now I am off to let WxMan know.... ::happy dancing all the way::

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Age.... just a state of mind.

(The following 40 second commercial may not be safe for work if your boss does not like rap music or seeing people in their skivvies - just FYI.)

I can think of a few people I know that might just start a little poker party like this regardless of age. More than a few, actually. Heh.

Hat Tip Loretta and Dal

Barbeque sounds good!

Too bad we still have all of the freeking snow... Ready for the Brain Bender??(from the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar)


Michael went to the supermarket to buy food for a big barbecue. At the meat counter, he spent half of what he had. In the bakery section, he spent half of what was left plus $10. He then spent half of what was left plus $5 for paper products. He had $5 left so he treated himself to a couple of donuts and a coffee.

How much money did Michael start out with?


And more importantly, where is he liquor/beverage budget for this gig?? What are folks going to drink for heaven's sake?? That's what *I* want to know...

Well, like always, the answers will be found later in the comments. See you then! (And apparently BYOB!)

It's Picture Day!

Whoohoo! And I instantly remembered that it was picture day the minute I saw Sporta this morning...

You wanna know how I *knew*?


She had cut her own bangs.

Lovely. **sigh**

Do they EVER grow out of doing that??? Methinks not.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Winter Wonderland

Alternate title - My Trees are Sad... Look...
(Click the pics to embiggen...)

Note the broken branches underneath...

Buddy Wisdom: "But Mummy - I like the snow...."

Yeah, whatever....

Flowers in the blizzard...

Well, it's better than Flowers in the Attic - remember that book? And that creepy assed movie?

I once dated a guy that seemed vaguely familiar to me when we met. Years later I discovered that it was because he looked so much like the actor who played the eldest brother in the movie. Like I said, creepy. Though the guy was kinda cute...

Anyhoo, the Brain Bender today has us thinking about flowies. Ready to play?


The names of three flowers are interlettered below. Can you find them? (The letters are in consecutive order.)



Alrighty then, you know what to do. The answers will be found later in the comments. I'm off to shovel snow... Poor flowies.

Old man winter takes one last stand....


Yup, that's pretty much what I'm seeing....

Dang. I am over winter. And I am not the only one, either. Where is that early spring we were promised?? Bring it on!!

Update: Yup, it's a full on blizzard. They're closing school.
:-( So much for "spring break" huh?

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

What not to Wear

Should be followed by "What not to Say." WxMan needs these shows... Bad.

As we walked to the kitchen the other day - he to get a snack of some sort, me probably to clean something, I made the observation...

Me: "Babe! Those pants are absolutely falling off of you! You look like you should be throwing gang signs and rappin' and wearing your hat upside down and backwards or something. You developing a new style there, Homie?"

WxMan: "Nah..." ::reaching into the freezer to get an ice cream bar:: "That's just what happens when you lose 25 pounds. You should try it!" [emphasis mine]

Me: ...

Me: "Oh hell no - that sentence did NOT just come out of your mouth!"

WxMan: "Uhhhhhhh..." ::backing away holding the ice cream bar like some kind of weird crucifix:: "No! I meant you should try one of these!"

Me: "Dude - you are soooooo toast. "

WxMan: ::ducking out the door:: "Love ya! You're beautiful!" ::escapes the kitchen::

Good gray grief - sometimes the damn Y chromosome really ticks me off. He cuts out his afternoon candy bar and shortens his commute by an two hours and *POOF* - 25 pounds gone. Me? Not so much. It's infuriating! Not surprising... but maddening none the less, the little show off...

Either way, it's not like we haven't had interesting conversations in my kitchen before where I marvel at the things he can think to do or say. Nuh uh. But he should be glad that he was out of arms reach this time...

Very glad.

Parts is parts people...

(Didn't that phrase come from some sort of chicken nugget commercial? It just popped into my head...)

Anyhoo, here is the daily Brain Bender. Ready to play?


Fill in the blanks to complete the familiar sayings below (each one contains a body part).

K_ _ _ * Y _ _ _ * E _ _ * O_ * T_ _ * B _ _ _.

K _ _ _ * Y _ _ _ * S _ _ _ _ _ _ _ * T _ * T _ _ * W_ _ _ _.

D_ _ _ * K _ _ _ _ _ _ * U _ _ _ _.

(and ignore the *'s - they are for spacing purposes only)


Alrighty, you know what to do. Answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!


You hear that?

Yeah - me either. Spring Break is officially over. O.V.E.R.

Thank Heavens.

Everybody went away today - kids to school, WxMan to work, and I am blissfully alone.

You know, I don't realize how much I crave my quiet until I am denied any for a while. Like 10 days... (Not that I was counting or anything.)

Now don't get me wrong, I would throw myself in front of a burning train to protect my family. Without hesitation! But it is sometimes very nice to know that I am not going to be having to do any pre-teen negotiations for a while (Holy hormones, Batman!) or pick up any Hubby clutter or fix anybody other than me lunch today.


That's nice.

And the house will stay picked up for six straight hours. Golden, that.

Now if it just wouldn't snow tonight.... But that's what I get for putting the boots away. Dang it.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Deadly handsome men

This is a fine pairing for the video I posted earlier... I especially enjoyed "pole dancer guy" about halfway through. Not as easy as it looks is it, Buddy? Heh.

And many more "notes to self" have been written...


h/t to my blogless friend Susie

Math on a Monday

And a little early to boot... I have a date with the dryer and sock basket. But you guys can play! Here is the brain bender via the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Ready to play?


Find a six-digit number in which the first digit is one less than the second, the fourth digit is three more than the third, the fifth digit is one less than the fourth and the last digit is one less than the fifth. The sum of the first and third digits equals the last, the sum of the second and last digits equals the fourth and the sum of all digits is 21.


Good grief! I suck at the math ones... I just do. So I leave the answer finding to you - like always the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Hey Grace!

Oh yeah - this is like a video guide of what *not* to do when you are hanging out with your girlfriends.

There are several "notes to self" there...

h/t Loretta and Dal

Sunday, April 08, 2007

What a good bunny...

Oh yes, the Easter bunny has been very, very good this year. :-)

And I even remembered to have somebody shoot a quick picture of us all after church this morning!

Even if we all can't seem to smile purty at the same time, it's been a while since we were dressed up. A looooong while...

(And though I wish the girls would agree to getting their bangs cut - after seeing the dude 15? 16? with the bright blue mo-hawky thing at services this morning, I felt pretty good about the girls hair. Funny how that works...)

Anyhoo, the girls awoke to hidden eggs and baskets - you're *never* too old to hunt for eggs or presents in my world. Heh. And they had a blast. Especially when they finally found their "big" present. (And holy crap - we got a really good deal on them if the prices on Amazon are accurate.... Yay!)

And the Easter Bunny left a little something something for WxMan and I - an offer on our house! Whoohoo!!!

Now we just need to make sure that all is in order before we counter or accept the offer.

But whoohoo anyway!

I am happy dancing in my bunny ears.... Wait - that didn't come out quite right... Happy hopping would probably be better, you think?

Saturday, April 07, 2007


Alrighty then, now that I am done with showings for the moment, I can concentrate on the Easter portion of the weekend!

Time to retrieve the girls' baskets and prepare for a visit from the big bunny. And yes - I do own my own ears. And I wear 'em too...

Something different this year, instead of cooking a big dinner like I usually do - the plan is that we are going to go out for Easter dinner.

Out. For a holiday meal. This is waaaay weird for me...

But you know, all kinds of thing have got to give when at any given moment perfect strangers want to walk through your house and look into your closets. All kinds of things. (And hey - so the people today were in my house for dang near an hour! Yes I was spying - sue me. Is that a good sign? Or just really creepy??)

But as I drove past the new place today (Hooray, we have windows!) I tried to remind myself that it's all for a good reason.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go put some more money into the girls' therapy fund... And rest for a minute. Then I'll get my ears on.

Happy Easter!

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Holy crap...

I am absolutely torturing myself with these "sell this house" shows on HGTV.

Sadistic? Yes...

But these people are freeking smart! And crazy! And exhausted! And selling! And I am getting some good ideas! And hives from fear / expectation! And headaches from cleaning fumes! All the while, knowing that I am mentally masturbating into a corner from which there is no escape.

And I just can't seem to help myself.... (And yes - we have two showings tomorow and Saturday.)


What's in a name?

That's what the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar wants us to figure out.

Okay - so they just want us to find the names. Ready to play?


The names of three people are hidden in the sentence below. Can you find them? (The letters are in consecutive order.)

I wanted to go to the movies, but my dad would not allow it.


I want to go to the movies too, but with showings of the house scheduled that's not going to happen. But hey, gotta show the house to sell it, right? Right?? And then all of the work is worth it. And the kids can have therapy later - it's all good...

Anyway, the answers will be found later in the comments. And I don't know about the MENSA folks but I saw more than three names... But maybe I am just smarter than they are. ;-)

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Spring Break Snow Day with Daddy...

Cozy, Eh? And reason 4,278 why we can NEVER not have a ginormous rocker / recliner somewhere in the house. Daddy needs his chair.

And yes - today it is snowing. I turned the furnace back on and everything.**sigh**

Fortunately we are happily enjoying the comforts of home. Today is the first day in an AGE that we are all home together, and there is literally nothing planned and no where we need to go. No School, no church, no events, no practices of one sort or another.



So we just finished up a huge brunch - breakfast burritos (eggs, sausage, sauteed peppers, seasoned potatoes, & cheese), biscuits and sausage gravy, and fresh fruit. And now we are going to pat our tummies and relax a bit. Even me.

I am going to try to ignore my To Do list for awhile. We'll see how that goes. But it's too tempting to *not* take a little time off myself. And I have a good book. And a comfy chair of my own. And a woobie.

Hey, a little R&R can't hurt. Right? (Now watch - the realtor will be calling within minutes to schedule a showing... That's just the way my world works.)


Since I neglected to post the Brain Bender yesterday, we'll have a twofer today! Ready to play?


Five words starting with AP or APR are defined in the list below. What are the words?
  • Relevant ________
  • Be in favor of __________
  • Choose for a position __________
  • The sounds of hands clapping ________
  • Obvious __________


Palindrome Pals

Anna and Otto did very well in sports and collected many medals and trophies. Until they could build a special case for their prizes, they kept them in an appropriate place. What did they call it?

_ _ _ _ _ _ * _ _ _ _ _ _


Alrighty then, the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar has done it's part - now it up to you. Like always, the answers will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Gone fishing shopping...


We are in dire need of something new and springy to wear for Easter. And with the stormy weather promised today and possibility of snow tomorrow (*sigh*) the timing couldn't be any better...

Just please Lord, do not let my girls think that this is cute-->

Back! Back to 1984 where you belong!!! Arrrgh...

I feel old.

Update: Okay, now I feel old and tired...

The good news? Proper togs were acquired. Sporta took the ENTIRE DAY to find something that she could tolerate liked. And once I found a cute white cropped jacket to top it off, she is still happy and I think it is appropriate. Whew!

Computa took a little less time with her selection (hello!) and decided on a more colorful approach.

By the time we got to the shoe portion of the ordeal, both girls were begging to go home. But to be honest, I wanted this endeavor to end... TODAY. Fortunately, the shoes were happily decided on in relatively short order.

Either way, I think the girls have inherited my "anti-shopping gene" and will more readily agree to shopping online. Heh. I know *I* will...

And yes - I got a new dress too. Three way mirrors are mean... Just sayin'.

And sorry for the lack of brain bender today - I'll post a twofer tomorrow.

Monday, April 02, 2007

Money, Money!

That's the theme for today's Brain Bender from the handy dandy discount MENSA calendar. Ready to play?


Andrea found a jar with many coins in it. The coins added up to $8.50. There was [shouldn't that be there were??] an equal number of dimes, quarters and half-dollars.

How many of each did she find?


Hey - $8.50 will buy ya lunch I'm thinking. You know what to do - the answer will be found later in the comments. See you then!

Border Babes

That is what Tammi has dubbed our little group. Heh. Near the border? Yup. Babes? You betcha. And we had a ball...

Now keep in mind, I am not much of a "shopper" per se. I would almost always perfer perusing stores online, rather than in person. I just would. But when it comes to shopping with a group of girfriends?? That's just pure fun!

Between Tammi keeping us all together and comfy and making sure that no one was left behind distracted by something sparkly, Ktreva trying on all sorts of cute clothes (Contagion should be VERY happy with her purchases), and TNT - beloved wife of Harvey - and I adding continually to the snark... (I think we had the most fun in Williams-Sonoma, actually. Or maybe Sharper Image.) It was a great way to spend a rainy afternoon!

There was certainly lots and lots to look at - people and merchandise. Tammi and I had to giggle at "my first tattoo parlor set" that we saw in the Discovery Channel Store. The packaging shows two nine year olds happily tattooing eachother - every mother's dream, that...

Then there was the couple shopping for pierceables together. Holy crap - the things people are willing to set of metal dectors with these days! But you know the old saying - more holes mean a stronger marriage (and chillier draft for that matter). Heh.

Then there was the Mother of all Bratz Dolls. Seriously. A living breathing bratz doll walked by - pink hair, "style" for days, clunky shoes, pouty mcpouty and 'tude out the wazoo. I wish I had been brave enough to get the camera out. She *had* to be their Queen Bee or creator, or whatever. Scary...

Finally, there was the store that I am sure Harvey would have wanted us all to shop at. Women are apparently encouraged to forgo clothes all together and simply wear accessories. look--->
(click to embiggen)

Snark, lunch, laughter, and we all came home with a little something something that made us happy. Perfect. And we have plans for more...


So today it's back to reality for me. I have floors to polish and bills to pay, but after all the fun yesterday, it's all good. Thanks Ladies!