Reminds Me of Me

I thought my contraception was rock-solid - it
hadn't ever failed me before. But, Spidey came anyway. He wasn't an oops,
because there was no slipup; he was a BLAMMO!, hand-of-God kind of baby. I was, not to put to fine a point on it, totally and completely
unprepared.

I read this post the other day and it really struck me how much her thoughts about pregnancy (and getting pregnant) reminded me of myself. K was a *pill* baby as well and her sister A was the direct result of one night of....

....oh my goodness the baby actually went to sleep and no grandparents are here and we have been exhausted/smelly/stressed for so long and right now we're not and you are still kinda cute do you wanna have a quickie???....

And I was breastfeeding for heaven's sake! You're not supposed to get pregnant while you are breastfeeding!!! Our Nurse Midwife actually had me show up to a pre-natal class she was teaching after A was born as an example of how you really *can* get pregnant while breastfeeding. Great. I got to be the *example*.

Anyway, the result was 2 girls, 16 months apart. I can remember being 9 months pregnant with A, standing in the middle fo the livingroom, crying because I was too huge to successfully pick up a tub-o-legos (K was going through a "dumping stuff out is FUN!" stage) when it suddenly dawned on me that I was royally SCREWED! (Fast forward to now and having the girls so close in age is great -- it was just rough for about 5 years.) Oh, and the legos ended up duct taped shut and on a high closet shelf for about 6 months. Heh. Mess with me and see what you get!

Anyway, I never intended to be a Mom. We weren't going to even have children! But here I am. A Mom to the nth degree and I couldn't be happier. Really. :-) If someone had told me this when I was 21 (and knew EVERYTHING!! btw) I would have laughed and argued. No way jose!! But she's right -- in that instant that Kendall left me and became her *own* person I felt a shift:

and every
fear, every doubt, every
moment of despair all were allayed, instantly, by
just a glimpse of his
face. I got over all my bullshit in a trice, because
it just wasn't all about me
anymore. That's the real miracle. It's just
wasn't my movie any
longer.

Hubby said later that he actually saw a change in my eyes. And that was a *good* thing -- I didn't like kids. At. All. And I was terrified that I wouldn't like my *own* either. That turned out to not be the case thank heavens and I am happier than I ever thought I could be. Not hat is isn't work mind you. And it can be easy to lose your sense of self. And I am still afraid of screwing up. But becoming a Mom was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Now if I could just get everyone to remember to flush.....................

Sick Kids

'Cuz there just wasn't *enough* to do...........

Both girls have been home from School the past 2 days. A, the youngest, had a stomach bug and spent a lot of yesterday screaming "MOMMY!!!" And running to the bathroom. The only up side to the situation is that she made it every time. (Thank God). K has a cold. Fever and a cough that sounds like we have been keeping her caged in a coal mine all winter. I have a feeling that she will be home again tomorrow -- so much for *my* plans (such as they were) and reason number 14,895 why I can't get a "real" job. Who would care for the girls when they were sick?

Lovely day here today too -- I was going to go get some hostas and finish planting the front flower beds that hubby and I have worked so hard to re-do. And I know hostas aren't flowers so to speak but they're cheap, they grow here like CRAZY, they will come back every year and I am horticulturally challenged. Severely challenged. Like plant plague. But I am trying to reform. :-) So no trips to the greenery or Wal-mart for me. *sigh*

Oh well, there is always the weekend.................

Ghost

No I don't have one..............

But I saw this today and wish that the Michael Moore believers in our society got the message.
http://oldbluejacket.com/General_Patton_Message.htm

'Nuff said.

Uncle Ben update 5-23

It has been a while since I posted on Uncle Ben (or since I've posted much of anything for that matter!!). Uncle Ben is home recovering from the surgery he had removing his kidney, lymph nodes, and as much of the cancer as they could. He starts chemo on the 31st and things are actually looking a bit hopeful. Scary still, but hopeful! So now we wait and see (some more) how he responds to the chemo. I am thankful they can do SOMETHING.

OMG I'm a Groupie??

Really? I've never been one before!

In my email this morning from Mr. BadExample:

Sorry for the delay in responding. I've been working on putting together
a special blogroll for people who've told me they found my blogging advice
helpful. I finally got around to doing it tonight.
You're on it :-)Harvey

So Wow! I'm on a blogroll!! Yay! But a groupie?? Hmmmmmmmm. I never thought of it that way.

Groupie: n. 1 : a fan of a rock group who usually follows the group around on concert tours2 : an admirer of a celebrity who attends as many of his or her public appearances as possible3 : ENTHUSIAST, AFICIONADO

So okay, I'm a groupie. And when I looked at the comapny I am in on the groupie blogroll it looks like a pretty cool spot to be with some pretty cool folks. So thanks again Harvey!!

Bad Mom

Sheesh!

And who is the bad mom you ask? Why that would be ME! Oh crap! We have been saving cardboard tubes for MONTHS For the marble roll project thing for K's class and I hung the sack-o-tubes on the door so we wouldn't forget to take them to school. So Monday, of course, we forgot. No biggie I think, we have 'till Wednesday to take the tubes in.

Fast forward to about an hour ago. I am sitting down for a quick sandwich pleased for having survived a Woodman's run and getting the dishes done when I suddenly remember it's WEDNESDAY -- TUBES ARE DUE!!! So I go to the door -- no sack-o-tubes. **sinking feeling in stomach** Oh crap, go look in the garage-- nothing. Call Hubby about missing tubes........ *sigh* He saw them hanging on the door Tuesday morning and ran them out to recycling "for me". Awwwwww CRAP!! I could just cry. Over stupid cardboard tubes. How dumb is that. Sheesh! Bad Mom. Bad Mom!

Surely Kendall won't be scarred for life over the lack of tubes, right? Crap. I hate when I drop the ball................