I smell like cookies...
No, really! Yummy sexy cookies. I think I like it...
You see, it's summertime. And getting hot. And sometimes it is nice to wear something sleeveless... One problem - I am pale. Not just white, mind you... I'm talking translucent here. Damn near blue...
And just between you and me - bluish white skin should stay covered up. Really. It is not all that attractive in shorts and a tank-top and I am pretty sure that it gives people headaches to look at. (What?? Everybody knows that!)
Anyway, I am also unwilling to "lay out" in the sun... I HATE laying out - always have. I get a headache, I hate to be hot, I always end up either underdone or overdone, and then there is the whole skin cancer thing. Some how I just don't see the appeal! And where the hell would I find the time??
Also, I am afraid of what I like to call the big blue coffin... Also known as a "Tanning Bed." First, there is the whole prospect of willingly getting into a glowing blue coffin - that just seems inherently wrong to me. Then there are the thoughts of all the others who have laid in the "coffin" before me... sweating... breathing...cooking tanning... ugh.
Salon/spa spray on tan?? Sorry, I'm cheap. It doesn't last long and costs $$$. Besides, didn't you see that Friends episode where Ross only gets sprayed on one side?? I did - and that's just the sort of thing that would happen to me. And if you do it at home, you inevitably turn yourself orange... Orange is *not* my color.
Self tanning lotions?? Well, there is still the danger of turning your self orange, which sucks. And I seem to be mildly allergic to them all anyway. Nobody wants to be orange and itchy...
But this stuff?? Brown Sugar it's called. One of those "I'll just buy something that's less than $20..." from a friend's "spa party."
I must admit - it's fabulous.
Smells good, gives me just a lightly toasted sunkissed hue, doesn't stain my clothes.... It's perfect.
And it really does look like dessert! See???
Cookies. Yummy, sexy cookies. And maybe I can stop blinding people...
That's nothing but good.
You see, it's summertime. And getting hot. And sometimes it is nice to wear something sleeveless... One problem - I am pale. Not just white, mind you... I'm talking translucent here. Damn near blue...
And just between you and me - bluish white skin should stay covered up. Really. It is not all that attractive in shorts and a tank-top and I am pretty sure that it gives people headaches to look at. (What?? Everybody knows that!)
Anyway, I am also unwilling to "lay out" in the sun... I HATE laying out - always have. I get a headache, I hate to be hot, I always end up either underdone or overdone, and then there is the whole skin cancer thing. Some how I just don't see the appeal! And where the hell would I find the time??
Also, I am afraid of what I like to call the big blue coffin... Also known as a "Tanning Bed." First, there is the whole prospect of willingly getting into a glowing blue coffin - that just seems inherently wrong to me. Then there are the thoughts of all the others who have laid in the "coffin" before me... sweating... breathing...
Salon/spa spray on tan?? Sorry, I'm cheap. It doesn't last long and costs $$$. Besides, didn't you see that Friends episode where Ross only gets sprayed on one side?? I did - and that's just the sort of thing that would happen to me. And if you do it at home, you inevitably turn yourself orange... Orange is *not* my color.
Self tanning lotions?? Well, there is still the danger of turning your self orange, which sucks. And I seem to be mildly allergic to them all anyway. Nobody wants to be orange and itchy...
But this stuff?? Brown Sugar it's called. One of those "I'll just buy something that's less than $20..." from a friend's "spa party."
I must admit - it's fabulous.
Smells good, gives me just a lightly toasted sunkissed hue, doesn't stain my clothes.... It's perfect.
And it really does look like dessert! See???
Cookies. Yummy, sexy cookies. And maybe I can stop blinding people...
That's nothing but good.
posted by Richmond | 9:17 AM
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