My occasionally snarky thoughts on everything from motherhood, politics, life and current events. Cocktails are sometimes mandatory. Bottoms up!

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

I am being hunted....

By rabid Mary Kay ladies...

Good grief.

I was accosted a couple of weeks ago in ShopKo of all places.

Rabid Mary Kay Lady: "Hey, hi! I just couldn't help but stop you. Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful skin??"

Me: "Uhhhh..."

RMKL: "Well, you do. Would you be interested in a free makeover?"

Me: Looking around for something to distract the RMKL, something shiny... "Uhhhhhh.... I hadn't ever thought about it."

RMKL: "Oh, well then..."

...and she entered into her diatribe about the great fun that is a Mary Kay Makeover.


For the record, I am a nice person. I do not easily tell folks to piss up a rope. I just don't. Which is to my detriment... Often...

And look, I'm a girl. I *do* wear makeup. Just not applied with a trowel. I have sucked it up MANY times before and gone to friends "spa" parties - because I know that there is a head count involved and invariably there will be wine there. In that sense I am just helping out - making sure they get enough folks to receive their "hosting" gift or 20% off or whatever.

But these Mary Kay Ladies?? They are of another breed entirely.

Accosting a perfect stranger in the midst of Back-to-School shopping is just wrong. Also *wrong* are the matching pale pink twinsets and faux pearls - there's a warning right there! Kind of like those brightly colored tree frogs that will kill you if you touch them.

And then when they have you mesmerized by their faux bling charm and false compliments, they somehow vulcan mind meld you into giving them your number. *ACK!* And the dreaded calls begin.

"What was I thinking?!?!?" You'll find yourself asking anyone who will listen. "I gave her my freeking home number just because I'm nice! I need to stop being nice...."

And I have been fielding the calls with grace thus far. A friend has encouraged me to channel my inner curmudgeon and tell the Rabid Mary Kay Lady that I am most assuredly not interested.

And I have thanked the RMKL for her offer of a "Free Makeover and Skin Care Demonstration" but NO THANKS. Not really interested. Do you think she'll ever get the message? Or will little Ms. Curmudgeon have to come out and play??

Update: Oh yeah... Rachel over at Pereiraville totally got me. I had an absolute "Holy CRAP!!!" moment when she called and identified herself as my Rabid Mary Kay Lady. Heh. It was a good gotcha. And of course she blogged about it.